And I keep on walking….

"There's a place far away...I wanna be there some day"....

As expected (http://unknownrahul.blogspot.in/2012/12/another-yearanother-step.html) 2013 is turning out to be an year to remember. I believe am moving in the right direction. I am not scared to walk alone though am blessed to have someone walking with me, holding my hand and trusting the direction am taking. The journey though difficult is definitely a memorable one….

With time, I understood how important it was to experience failure in life, how important it was to see bad times, how important it was to be alone. At the same time I understand that how critical it was to learn from all that and gather strength to get up and start walking again.

Life is not dull if you have some goal, life is not dull if you have a clear priority in life. Life is not dull even though you have to walk alone in achieving that goal. But yes life is beautiful if there is someone walking with you sharing the same goal.

When I close my eyes, I visualize where I want to be….I know that place is far away right now….but I know that I want to be there some day….and I trust myself that I will make it there one day…..and I trust that I will not be alone when I reach there….

My Education Safari

Wow… am an MBA…. I have seen my diploma so many times already in one week, I even got it laminated already ….  Its definitely one of the very special moment for me and my family , more so because no one expected me to go for graduation left alone post graduation. I surprised many including myself to go for it. Well in my dad words “ am the first boy to be a post graduate in whole of our khaandan and the first boy of my generation to even think of studying after 12^th :D .

When I look back , I myself can’t believe I was topper till 6^th standard. Oh yeah I was one of those kids who got  first rank almost every time  and cried like its end of world on getting 2^nd rank :D.

Then I went to Chennai , wooah .. was shocked to see how much the guys there studied. Even after getting 100 in mathematics , 90 in Hindi I  saw myself holding 5^th rank . After little bit of anlaysis I realized they are superhumans and they got 100 even in social studies . So after an year or so after consistently coming in top 10 I got used to being not a topper and started enjoying it also. No more worries about marks and ranks. But yeah that got bells ringing in my parents head they realized that “Rahul to gayaaa”..

So when in 9^th standard I came back to Delhi , it was then my sisters forced me to join tuitions thinking that my percentage will improve , oh yeah I got 78% in first term of 9^th standard , well nothing changed even after that except consistently getting more than 95 in Mathematics.

In 10th I faired decently, my sisters had scared me so much about board exams that I studied a lot. But just a month before board exams they both got married so I didn’t get to study much plus some bad luck in Hindi language paper, I ended up just above 80% .

Pheww...after that started the downfall. I fought a lot with my sisters to let me take commerce but then no one listened to me and I took science finally. Oh yeah I even enrolled for IIT prep , but all those classes about molecules, potential energy were like bouncers for me. I consistently failed in the FIITJEE tests and was just passing the school papers. Then after first term of 12^th, I realized if it goes on like this, I might fail in board exams too. So I went to my dad and told him about my thoughts. Oh yeah it was the first time ever I talked with dad about my studies. After that for next few months I took tuitions just for board exams . Nothing was improving much though, I failed in chemistry in pre board exams.

I still remember I was so scared when 12^th class result was about to come. Normally one is able to make it out expected percentage but I had no clue. I didn’t know if I made right molecule diagram in Chemistry or used the right formula in physics. I had lost trust in language papers after getting low marks in Hindi in 10^th. Finally result came and I got what I deserved, just little less than 80%.

I thought chalo khatam hua sab. Then suddenly had so many entrance tests lined up. I knew I wasnt good enough to clear the big tests like IIT, DCE, AIEEE , so I even gave Maharashtra, Karnataka and Punjab CET. Side by side I also filled Hotel Management  form, DU form( DU remains an unfulfilled dream L ) , bought CA form , NDA ,BCA form too with a hope that to clear atleast one of them. Oh yeah I had no clue what I wanted to do but my family was clear that engineering hi karvani hai ladke ko.

 Somehow I managed to clear IP paper. I remember after completing that paper I saw I had not attempted 30 continuous questions, so I marked all of them B thinking the laws of probability would be in my favor: D. Clearing that paper led to a BIG discussion at my home. I ruled out dropping a year to prepare for Engg Entrance , I told my parents and sisters that Its not my cup of tea. Then they told me DU no ways , CA no ways . So finally I thought let me go for engineering , college is in Delhi , 4 years  of fun.

Oh it was fun but scary. 4 years, all guys gang , I played cricket, table tennis , volleyball,football etc etc etc. I used to cram the figures of amplifiers and equations 2 days before paper. Everytime before paper I used to be very scared , so scared that I was not able to even drive car to the examination center. After every term there was atleast one paper in which I was sure to flunk. I still don’t know how I managed to clear Btech without a suppli (Grace marks saved me here  J ) .  The only thing I learnt in Btech was software coding. Oh yeah I think am good at it even today , it showed during my tenure at infy , I was among the toppers there during training. J

But luckily during Btech days I realized where my actual interest was. I understood I had a liking towards learning about the way things work in this world. So I started preparing for MBA but soon realized getting into good MBA college in India is tough. I tried finding an escape route and went to Australia and UK councils to find more about B schools there. However, I realized going there was waste of money as the returns were low.

So I gave CAT with optimism , got low percentile in first attempt ,somehow managed to get decent percentile in second attempt but still it wasn’t easy. Did miserably in GD/PI and was no where close to getting admission . Then suddenly I don’t know who smiled at me and I got a call from IMI one month after the college had opened. I wasn’t confident about myself performing in CAT next year so decided not to test my luck again and accepted the offer. Wow, MBA was almost exactly I wanted studies to be. I again started enjoying education , learnt a lot and had amazing time in college.

Sitting today I wonder what if I actually had been serious about my interest after 10^th standard and took up commerce. May be thing today would be little different and better, no regrets though , just a thought. J  Bas ab ek Executive MBA karne ka mann hai from abroad. :D

Truth for some , Fiction for others

A WALK TO REMEMBER

It was a difficult journey. One wrong step meant a free fall to hell. He was walking very carefully. It was dark moonless night .He had walked continuously for last so many days. Finally, he saw a small rest house. He decided to rest there for some time and entered in it. Suddenly he heard sound of someone weeping. He took out his sword and walked in the direction of sound. He saw a girl sitting there. He asked her politely about her destination. She quietly gave him the map. He compared her map with his map and realized that they both definitely have same path to traverse for next few years. However, before he said this to her, he heard a beautiful voice asking him “Do we both have same destination”? He realized if he said No then she wont walk with him. At the same time, it was night and he could not leave her alone there.

He again looked at the map and saw that their path might change only after reaching the biggest rest house of journey. It was a special rest house. It was widely believed that one always meet some known person resting there. He was optimistic to meet his friends there and carry on the rest of journey with them. He told her Yes and thought that she will also meet her known ones there and carry on journey with them.

She asked him again if he was sure about it. He nodded in affirmation and told her to trust him. She wasn’t completely sure but still decided to walk with him. With the first ray of sunshine touching her face, he realized that she was a beautiful princess. With this, he also understood that she is not a strong girl and hence he should be extra careful and ensure she never gets hurt.

With time, they became best friends.  She trusted him completely with the directions that she never looked at her map anymore. They walked together for next two and a half years before reaching the special rest house. There he was happily surprised to meet his friends. He introduced her to them. She also met her close friends there. They decided to stay there for some time.

Meanwhile he got to know that from there he had to take a different path. He told this to her. She said she no longer cares for her destination and will go with him. He was delighted to hear this, as he too wanted to be with her. However, his friends told him it is not safe for a girl to walk on their path and thus it will be better if she goes on her path. He realized he could not risk her life for his selfishness. He told her that she could not join him. She started crying and pleaded him to change his mind.

His friends came and told him its time to move. He told her to carry on the journey with her close friends. She was still crying. He had no option to walk away. After walking for 15 days with his friends he told them that he is going back to see if she left for her journey or not. He said its important for his peace of mind to know her well being. His friends said he was going to ruin his life by going back but he decided it was important for him so he walked back. On reaching the rest house, he was shocked to see her sitting and crying there.

 He apologized to her and tried explaining her again the reason. But then he was shattered to hear this line from her , she told him “ The rest house from where we started the journey together , I was waiting there for four years just to find a companion who had the same destination as I had.” He understood that he had done a big mistake.

He asked for forgiveness. She refused. He then requested her to carry on her journey with her friends. She told him that its impossible for her to see the path as tears are refusing to stop coming down from her eyes. He realized that time is running out for both of them , so he picked her up on his shoulders and started walking towards her destination. She shouted at him to leave her there and go carry on with his journey but he told her that he deserves this punishment and will carry on until the time her tears stop and she forgives him. With time he observed her tears stopped but she wasn’t her usual self. He realized that his one mistake had spoiled her life. But he wasn’t going to accept defeat. Slowly he felt she was coming back to herself. It was a difficult journey for him both physically and mentally .After walking nonstop for more than eleven months, one night she told him to stop and take rest. He was so tired that he felt asleep the moment he lied down.

He woke up next morning only to find her missing. He realized that she had decided its time for her to move on in her life without him. She had become strong to walk alone in her journey. He also understood that she didn’t forgive him but it was just because of her pure heart and soul that she left him to go back and pursue his destination.

Today he is walking towards his destination with tears in his eyes because he lost his princess but at same time with a smile, that atleast he ensured she reached her castle.

Chalte Chalte

Ever it happened that you were after something for so long, cried for it, tried very hard for it and eventually when you got it, you started to think was it really worth that much.

We see this happening a lot to kids. We see them cry for a toy , parents get it for them eventually , they play with it for some time and then soon get  bored of it and start to think “ kaash doosra vala toy liya hota “.

With time, these things kept on happening but for other reasons. Didn’t ever this happen that you secretly liked someone and hoped to be with that person someday? Then one fine day that person talked with you and you realized naah that person is not the one for you and thus came down crashing your high hopes. You wished if that person never had talked with you, you were so much better off watching that person from distance. J

Didn’t ever this happen that you were after a dream job / college, made all the wrong sacrifices for it by neglecting friends and family. Then one fine day you achieved it and found the place was not actually the way you dream of it. Add to it you had travelled so much alone for the destination that you left your friends and family behind.

It rarely happens that we enjoy both the journey and the destination .Sometimes it happens due to “Loving the pursuit” human nature. As soon as we get to destination we start to think “What Next “and forget to enjoy good moments at destination. Sometimes the destination is not worth it itself.

So what actually important is to enjoy the journey. Do not make reaching the destination ultimate target so that you feel stressed during the journey.

“Focus on the journey, not the destination. Joy is found not in finishing an activity but in doing it.” – Greg Anderson